Reviews - Updated on March 29, 2022

As Dr. Bykov said, humor is chocolate. Especially if it’s self-irony from developers who make fun of clichés in video games. The Spaniard under the nickname Fran has been doing it professionally and for a long time. His most famous work, UnEpic, came out in 2014 and parodied computer RPG clichés, where we played a gamer and sci-fi movie buff who teleported into the game and was possessed by a dark spirit. Then, in 2016, there was the metroidvania Ghost 1.0, also equipped with great humor. And now UnMetal has come out, a parody of both Metal Gear Solid and typical action movies from the 80s in the style of “Rambo”. And this is perhaps the funniest game from Fran.

High security comedy

The protagonist of UnMetal is a seemingly ordinary American action hero Jesse Fox, who, however, is mistaken for a Russian by his own: he controlled a downed Soviet helicopter. About how this happened and why he was thrown into prison for a crime he did not commit (and no one has yet escaped from it), Fox tells during interrogation.

It’s going to be a long, surprising, and fascinating story, from how Jesse finally escaped his cell with a wire and toilet paper (this prison is inhabited exclusively by people named Mike – there is the largest concentration of Mikes in the world!), and ending with how he fought tanks and escaped helicopters in a rubber boat.

UnMetal: Overview

Now they will tell him: “You are under arrest for a crime that you did not commit!”

Jesse does not skimp on the details, describing his exploits in colors and, it seems, lying. After all, he tells the same story to a pretty girl some time after the interrogation. Of course, they do not particularly believe him and ask for details. “Mr. Fox, where did you get the rope from anyway? And how did they put a 10 cm wire into a 5 cm compass? – the officer does not calm down during interrogation. “I’ll tell you later,” Jesse replies calmly until he brings it to a boil.

UnMetal: Overview

Why, why … After all, they have loot!

He lies as follows: he goes to a new location, where at first it is empty, and begins to compose that, they say, there were so many guards here, barbed wire here, dogs there, and so on – and all this begins to appear before our eyes from the air. Or we ourselves decide how many, for example, guards will resist him.

So we actually regulate the level of complexity.

But it’s still flowers. We decide how many tentacles the next boss will have. And it’s not a fact that the number four means less than six – perhaps four tens will appear instead of six tentacles. In another situation, it depends on us who will be in the next location – enemies or … a herd of sheep.

UnMetal: Overview

Our hero moves through this herd at the speed of a turtle.

One of the funniest moments is when Jesse, with our help, declares that he was surrounded not by one or two rats, but by crowds of rodents. After that, he turns into a piece of cheese and starts running away in a funny way.

UnMetal: Overview

This happens to the music from The Benny Hill Show.

However, our brave hero uses not only imagination, but also ingenuity. So, he can inflict a wound on himself, so that the prison doctor who pointed the barrel at him, following the Hippocratic oath, began not to kill him, but to heal him. He will not be at a loss and impersonate his own (also Mike!), when he meets one of the guards in the toilet. By the way, we are saved in the toilets. And for quick saves, we use a portable pot. True, it immediately fills up (they say Jesse made a fright), and until we empty it in the toilet, quick saves will not be available.

UnMetal: Overview

Translation here is ours, Russian …

Hide, laugh and hit!

However, the main weapon of Jesse Fox is not fantasy and a sense of humor, but stealth. It is better to eliminate numerous guards imperceptibly and quickly, sneaking up from behind, and then search and hide the bodies. If at first you have to cut down only with your fists, then chloroform will become available, which must first be properly mixed in your inventory and applied to a handkerchief. True, the first time you use it, Jesse will not stand it and, out of pure curiosity, will pull his nose. You can imagine the consequences. Well, what can I say – sometimes Fox acts like a complete idiot.

UnMetal: Overview

What do we decide: was the guard sleeping when we appeared or was he awake?

If Jesse is noticed, then for the elimination he will not be given the experience points that are needed to get new levels. On each one, he chooses one of two useful skills – this can be an increase in movement speed, the ability to carry more first-aid kits, inflict double damage under certain conditions, and so on.

UnMetal: Overview

When alarmed, opponents begin to run out in droves at us.

During hide and seek, funny situations also happen all the time. Some of the guards are telling each other jokes and we need to seize the moment to sneak up on them while they laugh. Or we meet a sneezing guard (also Mike, of course) – and if at the moment of the next sneeze we find ourselves in the visibility zone, Jesse will automatically wish him health, and he will thank him and only then raise the alarm.

UnMetal: Overview

Of course, such a story would not do without a beautiful girl.

However, UnMetal is not only a comedy, but also hard, sometimes even hardcore action. Each hit results in bleeding that must be stopped. And they kill Fox with just a few shots – no humor and ingenuity will help here. And there are enough situations when you have to take an open fight. To do this, you can use a pistol, a slingshot that shoots uranium balls, a flamethrower, a rocket launcher, and also a somersault.

The flamethrower is old and overheats, so they need to burn carefully.

Plus, there are often dangerous traps – for example, you need to throw a makeshift bridge over sewer water and get out of the way of a droid rushing towards us.

Therefore, you often have to die, especially in fights with bosses, when non-trivial conditions apply – for example, one of the bosses attacks us with huge containers, and the other needs to be neutralized … with a globe.

Directing this weapon along the desired trajectory is not easy.

UnMetal is surprisingly peppy, at the same time hilarious (the author, of course, now and then says hello to the early releases of Metal Gear Solid) and difficult stealth action, in which there is not only stealth and action, but also the search for secrets and items that permanently increase performance, quest elements and passing tests. But most importantly, it has excellent humor – even when the characters begin to boringly beg for something like “Bring 12 batteries, and then I will help you!”, You see this as a conscious reference and irony about typical quests. So I strongly do not recommend skipping UnMetal – and you will receive a serious challenge and laugh to your heart’s content.

Pros: excellent parody plot; funny humor; bright characters; exciting gameplay; gorgeous music.

Cons: it happens that the game makes us run in circles and perform rather boring tasks; not everyone will immediately get used to the management.

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